Just in time for our daughter to start Kindergarten, we moved to a smaller city with better schools. We quickly got to know many of our neighbors via the bus stop. All of the other families had older children while we had our Kindergartner and a two year old. While many of the moms were spending their days volunteering at the school or hanging out together, I was working full time. While I loved my job, I hated being away and being that mom that couldn’t participate in special activities and was missing out on so much.
A few months in to that school year, I lost my job right around the holidays. My husband and I both searched for jobs. We decided whoever found a good job would be the working parent and the other would stay home. I was sad to not be at my old job anymore and helping the families I worked with. BUT, I was LOVING being home with my boy all day and being there for my daughter when she got on the bus and got off. Needless to say, I was excited when my husband found a job that seemed to be MADE for him. So we swapped roles again.
Since I was home with our boy, I had more time on my hands. Not that a two year wasn’t a handful. 🙂 I was invited to help out with various events at the school. It was difficult since I was home with a toddler and no vehicle. I was able to get rides to the school from time to time and took him along with me. It worked for some things, but some things, it didn’t. It was difficult wanting to be there for all of the events since I wasn’t tied down to a job, but it was only possible if my boy was able to be there as well.
I didn’t get to attend much at the school. With three PTA moms in our neighborhood and at the bus stop, my daughter noticed that they were ALWAYS at the school and I was not. She understood the struggles I had with being able to be there like them, but I still felt bad. I expressed many times how I hated not being able to do what the other moms were doing by being an active part of their kids’ school.
One day, one of the mom’s told me that it’s all about the seasons of life. She told me that it may be difficult to see where I was at in life and compare it to everyone else. She reminded me that I need to enjoy and find happiness in MY current season in life. MY season was being a stay at home mom who was always with her two year old. I LOVED the time with my boy. That conversation helped me a lot that week, year, and even still to this day.
These days, I’m still a stay at home mom. My boy has moved on to half day preschool this year and I’m saddened that in about 7 months, my boy is going off to BIG school, on the bus, with his sister, all day, everyday. I’m going to miss him so much just like I have missed my daughter all these years that she’s been in school. I am excited for him since he’s going to be learning and experiencing so many new things AND he gets to have his big sister on the bus with him and at his school for two years.
These past years I have indulged in the season of life I’ve been in and enjoyed it as much as I possibly could. I’ve loved it!
Years ago, as I looked in to the future of the time my boy would be in school, I thought about all the time I was going to have on my hands. I could invest more time into my home businesses. I could volunteer OFTEN at the school with BOTH my kids! Maybe I could get a part time job too. That season of my life was something I’ve looked forward to.
I no longer see myself with tons of time on my hands and I don’t see myself volunteering at the school as often as I like. But I’m okay, and happy with this.
This is because I’ll be entering a new, unexpected, but very much wanted, season of my life. I’ll be the stay at home mom, with two kids in BIG school, and a newborn to take care of! While some mom’s would go crazy starting over with an 8 and 5 year old, I am ecstatic. We had a rough year last year and this pregnancy, while stressful already, is giving us our precious third child to complete our family. I’m super excited about relearning all things pregnancy and baby and entering this new season of life.
If you find yourself unhappy in your current season, look for ways to make it work for you. It may not be exactly what you hoped for, but it’s up to YOU to find ways to appreciate what you have going on and indulge yourself in what you HAVE and what you CAN do, right NOW. Don’t waste your current days, daydreaming about the future.
I’m going to do just that and go enjoy some one on one time with my boy.
I enjoyed what you said about not wasting your time daydreaming. I also liked the analogy of the seasons. The bible also uses that analogy and have referred Amber back to it often. While it is a little different for us because we homeschool, I know she looks forward to the season where the kids are a little(only a little, don’t want them growing up too much) more independent and she is able to do more around the house. As a Christian, I believe the secret is to find contentment in all circumstance as Paul said he had. When you realize that NO matter how hard things are or how many obstacles seem to compound each other, the Lord is still in control and wants you to learn something, I.e. patients, perseverance, our relying on God more than man. As we continually turn back to Jesus we find that his love overshadows any difficulty we may be facing in the moment. Plus, as my former pastor liked to point out, for us as believers in Christ, this life, no matter how bad or good it is, is the worst it will ever be for us. Stay strong and trust in the Lord. P.s. I think you’re having a boy.